AT&T is back for the third time
Remember my Fun With AT&T post? (hint: there isn’t a single shred of fun to be had)
Quick recap: after being a customer for seven years we:
- switched to Verizon in May 2012
- nuked everything related to AT&T from orbit
- paid my ETF
- paid a final service fee to wrap everything up
- got called once after all that because they thought we still had a line open and owed money
- was called a second time in September because AT&T still can’t get its shit figured out
AT&T just called a third time.
They thought the line was still open.
They thought we owed over $245.
I thought I took care of this over half a year ago.
The (to her credit: kind, understanding, and tolerant of my tempered rage) rep couldn’t even find a record of our account in AT&T’s system at first. Not like a “oh sure, you’re right here, it says you closed your account over half a year ago,” no record, a “as far as our computers are concerned, you have never existed as a human being before the moment you called me” no record. She had to look us up in some “other system” before she uncovered any of AT&T’s lingering, insidious, malicious ineptitude.
She says she took care of it, cleared the line, and closed the account once and for all.
So did the third rep (because the first two could barely comprehend complete sentences) I spoke with in September, just like the rep I spoke with earlier in the summer.
She says she also cleared the $245 we supposedly owed AT&T for performing the service of haunting my wallet the last six months.
It’s not that I doubt her; she was nice, patient, sympathetic, and swift in action once she was able to dig us out of the recesses of some basement AT&T server. Her name was Rebecca. Thank you Rebecca.
It’s just… AT&T can die a thousand times in a fire as a warmup for being simultaneously disemboweled and drawn and quartered ten thousand times over.